Angela Reitano (Tiffany's friend, and the hairstylist)

Entered April 4, 2018 from Ottawa

I would like to express my deepest sympathies for your loss. Although I have only had a few visits from Nicole and the kids at the shop, I did enjoy them very much. Nicole was so inspiring, and I enjoyed listening to some of the adventures she has had in her life with her family. May God Bless you and your children through this difficult time.
Angela

Ashleigh White 

Entered April 4, 2018 from Ottawa

Grateful to all her contributions to the homeschooling community in Ottawa. Sending heartfelt thoughts and prayers to her family at this time. May the love and strength that she gave be with you always.

Sue Schieman (Friend)

Entered April 4, 2018 from Orleans

I am so very sorry to hear of the passing of Nicole. I knew her only briefly through the homeschooling community, but I could tell she treasured her friendships, cared about her community and adored her family. My prayers are with you all.

Ayman Karmali (Fellow homeschooling mom)

Entered April 7, 2018 from Ottawa

Nicole will be missed dearly! Her contribution, and energy to the homeschooling community was invaluable. To her wonderful family: please be strong during this difficult time. Her message of making the best of each moment will always remain with us.

Marika Jemma (Friend)

Entered April 16, 2018 from Ottawa

Miss you always
Thanks for all the fun and Wednesday’s
Will take care of your family with love and board games as needed

Suspicious CT led to suspicious MRI led to last minute cancellation of trip. And – drum roll – more chemo. Oof. It’s been a bitter disappointment, I won’t lie to you. What a whirlwind of unraveling travel plans and worry and stress and new treatment. So if you see me walking down the street not in Asia, you’re not imaging things. And if I burst into tears when you exclaim, “What are you doing here?! I thought you were supposed to be in Tokyo?”, you’ll understand why. And if I wallow in self-pity at the thought of doing chemo on my 50th birthday instead of lying on the beach in Bali, I hope you’ll cut me some slack and just let me wallow.
From travellargefamily.com Nov 2017

Low Flying Planes

The last leg of my trip home from Barbados last week was an eighteen minute flight from Montreal to Ottawa. It was around ten thirty when we took off. Not midnight but still close enough to that significant hour. I had the window seat.

The whole flight was a beautifully shifting scenario of city lights obscured by will-o-wisp clouds and night sky. At first I was awed by the beauty and rarity of such a sight. Then I began to realize how far down the earth was and how tiny everything was and the most profound sadness came over me. I always thought I would be in Heaven looking down on my family and giving them love and strength from above. But now I realized that I would be much, much further away than the plane and even in the plane, I couldn't watch over anyone.

My family is everything to me. I met the perfect man when I was only nineteen and he has been my rock and my source of joy for thirty years. I birthed five children: watched them unfurl and grow into miraculous beings. I cannot bear to be separated from them. I cannot. I literally cannot.

I kept my maiden name. When we were a couple, we were even-steven. When we had one or two kids, the balance still seemed fine. But once there were three kids, I was always slightly apart. Everyone in my family had one name and I had another. And now I can't shake this irrational feeling that that's the reason that I'm the one that has to go.

I cried so hard on that flight I thought I would die right there and then. Thank goodness it was dark and there was no cart service. Thank goodness my husband was sitting next to me, stroking my hand. I sobbed the whole flight and arrived home from a beach holiday a desolate woman.

April 4, 2017